Wednesday, July 9, 2008


To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure about the whole blogging concept. An online diary that anyone can read? As extroverted as I am, even I’m not that open. A method of communication that doesn't involve interpersonal interaction? I’m still getting used to the idea of texting on my cell phone. As someone who simply says what she's thinking to the people she knows in real life, the idea of a virtual conversation with people I haven't even met is more than a bit questionable.

On the other hand, I’m a newly-minted blog addict. Especially the wedding variety. I adore reading the creative ideas and stories of others. And I have so many ideas of my own that I can’t possibly use them all. I wake up in the middle of the night to jot down incoherent, dream-induced thoughts in the hopes I can implement them in the light of day. I’ve also been inspired by two types of wedding blogs: (1) the uber-creative DIY Martha Stewarts of the world (think most bloggers), and (2) those that focus on sanity, responsibility, and mindfulness (like

My only complaint about the incredibly imaginative, inspiring, ingenious wedding blogs around the net –- grammar butchery. I cringe when I read an otherwise exceptionally well-written sentence that ends in a preposition. And the way that people have confused “my fiancé and I” and “my fiancé and me” befuddles me. I’m not arrogant enough to think that I always get my grammar right; I am a comma abuser, for example. But I’m on a one-woman crusade to share wedding sanity and creativity while using the best grammar I possibly can. That pretty much sums up the point of this blog.

As for the name, {cypress and oak}, I’m inspired by this excerpt from Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet, entitled “On Marriage.”

You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
Gibran’s words remind me of three essentials in wedding planning:
1. The relationship that came before and that will follow the wedding matters most. It is called marriage, and it is not a dirty word.
2. There should be spaces in togetherness, even (especially!) in marriage.

3. Enough talk of “the best day of my life” and “the perfect wedding”! What I want is ever so much more real and honest. A togetherness that endures in the silent memory of God. Yes. That’s it.

So, welcome to my journey to marriage, oftentimes known as wedding planning. It’s sure to be an adventure!

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